Montgomery County Neglect free-range parenting

• The only reason a 6-year old and 10-year old wouldn't be allowed to walk to a park one mile away unsupervised is incase they got lost along the way. Parents should try to raise their children to be independent and make smart and safe choices even if there is some potential for risk. Two blocks away is ridiculous to even question the safety, obviously there are sick people in the world that parents want to protect their children from, but the same parents that played freely as children are now shielding their children from the freedoms they once had. Its hypocrisy at its finest. We live in a sad world where the risk does have to taken into consideration. A parent will forever regret not walking with their 7-year old to the park a block away if it means they weren't abducted, but at what point does that become ludicrous? Gray and Rosin would argue for the children to be able to independently walk to and from playgrounds and even the metro. Especially with technology and GPS, parents shouldn't have to think twice about sending their kids out to play.

The Play Deficit

Gray has the main points that as children's ability to play unsupervised has decreased and become supervised by other adults and parents, mental disorders in children and teens has risen. Although this may not be direct causation, there is at least some correlation, whether due to the decreased unsupervised play or the increase in diagnoses. Not only have the diagnoses increased, but the suicide rate in teens has risen as well. Gray argues that there is a direct link between healthy (mentally and physically) children and teens and the amount of unsupervised risky play. Rosin's argument was more towards the nostalgic felt about the freedoms of the children in the past to the overprotected children of the present, where as Gray tries to show concrete proof of why the overprotected children are screwed in the present. Although they are both discussing the same topics, Gray's main point is driven home by facts instead of stories.

Overprotected kids

Risk is an inevitable factor in life, especially for children growing up. Parents try to minimize risk for their children by overstepping and overprotecting, to the point where curiosity and adventure aren't sought out. Some playgrounds might be considered "insane" for being too makeshift and unsafe, only because they don't have the limits of slides and swings. But these playgrounds provide the necessary tools for children to learn to seek out free play and adventure without the limits of normal "safer" playgrounds. Parents root themselves in the lives of their children, especially the outdoor play, always keeping watch. Parents have obvious concerns about safety and predators, so to a certain extent, the protectiveness is understandable, but at what point does it prevent their children from learning new behaviors, activities, and creativeness for themselves. Parents never want their children to be in danger, but in order for them to develop into independent teens and adults, the rational fears of parents need to be put aside and ignored.

Exploration is key to discovering new places, having a vivid imagination and providing play where there was originally none. As a child, I would explore the vast woods behind my house, climb trees without supervision. My parents gave me supervised experiences using powertools to build and learn the difference between taking risk and being in a dangerous environment. My parents wouldn't interfere when my brother and I wrestled, instead letting us work out our aggression knowing we wouldn't kill the other. There is risk, as a parent, letting these behaviors and scenarios play out, but without the risks I would not have learned a limit to causing pain towards other people or negotiation in getting out of painful circumstances. Even though my brother played much rougher than would be considered 'safe' and 'appropriate', I learned ways to manipulate the situation so that I would be in control, a skill that is necessary outside of just childhood play. I would go swimming in the creek at my grandmother's house with my cousins, and even though I would occasionally come back with bloody feet and knees from some of the sharp rocks, I learned to avoid certain areas and wade further into the water. Although that only helped me for that particular creek, it helped make me more aware in other similar situations, places that are more likely to have sharp rocks on the bottom were avoided, versus the best squishy mud to soak your feet in.  Remembering times when I would just go out on adventures, makes me nostalgic because I rarely see children exploring on their own. Technology has played a big part in the lack of drive children have to explore, because why would you go out and lost and dirty when you can see all there is in life on google? Although technology has made life tremendously easier, it has nixed the drive that is inherent in children. Parents' concerns also tend to transfer onto children and teens. Even now, I am much more apprehensive when going out into the woods or hanging out outside because of the horror stories of abductions and crimes associated with the outdoors. Now children stay inside, not experiencing freedom like we used to. Now a days, you can't leave home without texting at least one (if not both) of your parents to let them know 1. where you're going 2. who you're going there with 3. when you will be arriving 4. what you will be doing 5. what time you're going to leave 6.what time you'll be home. Although most parents have the best intentions and are just trying to keep their kids safe, what difference does it make if they know before rather than after? Obviously the parents might worry if they don't know where their child is, but its just as easy to lie but 1-6 than to tell them after and know their child is home safe when they see their face. This causes millennials to not only be reliant on technology, but also not enjoy their freedoms as much because its still like their parent is there with them. Children aren't as stupid and naive as parents might think they are, they're aware of risks they're taking, they just don't care as much about the consequences, which worries parents because they can't let their children learn on their own through their own actions and consequences.